I’ve been blog lazy lately. My last real blog post was a month ago with a couple small posts here & there to fill in space. I didn’t even realize how pre-occupied I was until my Twitter (carebear819) & Facebook feeds started blowing up with people asking when my next blog was. So here it goes!
I usually have an idea of what I’m going to blog about before I actually sit down to write. An idea will come to me & I bust out the old school writing style by handwriting it out first in my black & white Mead notebook. Yes, people still actually write things down & its not always typed out first…shocking I know! However, my mind has been filled with nothing but house-decorating & renovating ideas since I received the keys to my new Casa di Carey last month. Needless to say blogging has not been on my mind.
I prayed about it. Prayed for an idea that didn’t involve paint colors, tile styles, or DIY landscaping palettes.
And the idea came to me…and I was not happy.
I have a budget for this house. A tight budget & so far I’ve been (fairly) decent about staying within budget, so anytime I’ve been able to get a break on hefty purchases I jumped on it. I needed a refrigerator, my brother had an extra refrigerator. He must love me a lot that he offered up his beer fridge & it supplied a temporary fix that could buy me some time until my budget had a little more room to play with. He got it used a few years back & never had any problems with it…so I gladly took it, & once hooked up, it looked spiffy & was a nice fit (only missing a door handle, but hey that’s a $10 fix from Lowe’s).
I was happy.
I know first hand how a teeny, tiny white lie can grow into something beyond your control, so now I try everyday (very hard) to live honestly. Every single morning during my prayer time I include a request that the Lord keep me honest & that I make decisions that are pleasing to him. For the most part, I think I’m doing pretty good. I’m more aware of what I say & more aware of the reactions & consequences that can happen because of what I say. It’s still a struggle, but becoming less & less of one.
Two days ago I failed.
My schedule has been tight lately. Between working two jobs & trying to get this house ready for a move-in (not to mention the overbearing “cute” things that us girls have to do in order to make a house a “home”), my schedule hasn’t had much extra time. I thrive on full days, on full schedule’s. I don’t “relax” very well, so I haven’t minded, but other areas have slacked because of it. One being, I made a commitment to a friend & completely forgot about it. I didn’t write it down & it just slipped my mind. Personally, I hate when people use that excuse because, to me, it states that, “You’re not important enough for me to remember that commitment”…so I hate that I did that to a friend.
So I lied. Instead of being honest & telling them how busy I’ve been & that I just plain forgot, I told them that I was stuck at work & couldn’t leave when they texted me to ask if our plans were still on. Creep in that guilty conscious that warned me to tell the truth…to be honest, to give my friend the benefit of the doubt that they’d understand & be forgiving…I chose to ignore it & continue on with my lie.
A minute later my refrigerator made a loud buzzing noise & then went dark & silent.
After trying my hand at refrigerator repair (which means I most likely did more damage than good), I had to chalk up the fact that I’ll need to dish out the money & buy a new fridge. I have to take (a large sum) of money out of a budget that’s already tight, & buy a new stinking’ fridge. Grrrrrrr……
Because I’m an over-thinker (hang in there with me…this gets good), my mind automatically went to what I could have bought with the money that now will be used for a refrigerator. Let’s say that this weekend I went to a flea market & purchased a coffee table for my sunroom for $250. A coffee table that has the old wood antique look that will fit my horseshoe & sunflower decorated sunroom (trust me its looking cute!) perfectly. Five years from now the show, Antiques Roadshow, makes its way to Cleveland & I decide to take my coffee table in to get it appraised. To my surprise, it turns out to be a coffee table that Charles Ingalls (had to use a Little House reference for Heidi Strickler ) made as a wedding gift for his daughter, Laura, when she married Almanzo Wilder. And its worth….millions! Instead of enjoying the scenery from my log cabin in the mountains of Montana (hey, it could happen) I’ll be enjoying the scenery of my new fridge in the kitchen of my not-decorated home.
Would the refrigerator have broken regardless…probably (after all it was 15years old). Would my friend have forgiven me for forgetting our plans…guaranteed. Was God trying to teach me a lesson…ABSOLUTELY!!! I’ve said this a gazillion times, that I do not believe in luck or coincidence, that EVERYTHING & EVERYBODY you meet is part of a greater plan for your life that is designed by the Creator…however, this was my free will…my decision to lie & because of the control I took over the situation I have altered what could’ve been. I will never know…and Man, that feeling sucks!
So, I have since apologized to my friend & fessed up to my sin (they, of course, said “that’s cool, you’re a complete dork for apologizing”) & on my day off today, I have big plans of going refrigerator appliance shopping. But, I do it with a clear conscious & feel no guilt over dishing out a few hundred bucks on something that (possibly) could’ve been avoided.
In conclusion, just tell the truth..and when you find yourself not being honest, take immediate steps to correct your lie. And accept whatever consequences come your way with a smile on your face, knowing that you’ve been taught a lesson.
Maybe God will give me a break today & throw a pink fridge my way as a reward for my confession….yeah, probably not!
The refrigerator that taught me a lesson on lying!